Dear Tom,
Your funeral is just a few short hours away, and I'm not sure I'm prepared to say goodbye. I'm so torn with conflicting waves of thoughts and emotions.
In one moment I'm so glad that you are free of your earthly body that was bound for the last few years with disease all while your mind was just as clear and as sharp as ever; a prisoner to self. You are now free to run again, and dance, and laugh and free to worship and proclaim the name of the Lord. You are free to see sights that can nary be imagined by the temporal mind. You have reached your new dwelling place with Jesus. In this I find much comfort, but...
In other moments I am overcome with grief as this world, in these still seconds, seems a bit more empty, a bit more quiet, a bit more surreal. All though it has long since passed that you and I shared any good conversation or since I have learned some of those foundational pieces of my Christian walk from your leadership, the memories of you are still crystal clear. I often think of those many Saturday mornings that you would take our portion of ACC's chair team out to breakfast at Town and Country. Or the laughs late into the night that we had during Niagara conferences. Or the strong and yet quite sense of manhood and camaraderie you provided in my adolescence...
Yet in other moments still I am moved to this quiet anger. A carnal anger that screams, "NO! Not you! Why you?!" You are just simply to young to no longer be with us here, to be with your family here. You were snatched from this life too early, and though I, in my reasonable mind, know that you are in a far better place, my selfish heart cannot find solace.
My heart rejoices, and yet it breaks, Tom. I want to say thank you. I want to say thank you for all the things you ever taught me. I want to thank you for all the time you ever spent with me. I want to thank you for all the love you ever shared. Even though I know I will see you again one day, I miss you now. I say goodbye to you only for a while. I love you, Tom.
-Ryan
My name is Ryan. In a crowd, I'm your average guy. I don't stand out; I don't strike a claim to fame. To know me though, you wouldn't mistake that I am different from the rest of the world. I am a man of God's unique design, with a plan for my life that He has purposed just for me. I strive to live without worry. I dream in a world where dreams are so often left behind. I aspire to greatness. I wish to inspire. I welcome you to join me in a journey as I am discovering me.
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